An Open Letter to Ambien
An Open Letter to Ambien
I adore you, my dear friend. You are always there for me when I am in need. I love how just the two of us can have so many adventures and enjoy some fucked up shit together.
Remember that time we took a shower and fell into the curtain laughing our asses off? What about when we joined match.com? God we sure do have some fun times, don’t we?!
It saddens me that I am not always able to recall our wonderful times together, but in my heart of hearts I know that they are all amazing. Okay, maybe not that one phone call to an ex, but still…
The beauty of it all is now that this is in print for the world to see, I will be able to come back tomorrow and see what the fuck I actually wrote.
I love you, friend.
~Sassy
P.S. Could someone please text me and let me know that I wrote this? Kthx.
















Omg u fucking kill me!!!! Hope I see your sexy ass soon!!!!
Love you, girl! xx
it’s like i’m looking in a mirror
Today, I will be returning the $1151 online order I placed with Lands End, thanks to my good friend Ambien.
Holy shitballs!! Hahahaha
Is all I remember is a clock on the wall in Safeway and it was 3 am. How all the Spanish food got into my cart, I’m not sure. Now I have nothing to eat but a can of re fried beans!
Dam Ambien thought we where friends.
HAhahahaa, riiight?!
OMG how SASSY! I LUV THIS AND I LUV U!